Betrayed with a Kiss: A Tale of Friendship, Love, and Betrayal

Beloved one and friend,
Jittering, I called you;
In my very hometown,
I sought your face and found you.

You asked me, and I came–
At no small risk, with trembling;
A tender heart aflame,
Open to you and trusting.

We spoke of truth, goodness, and beauty,
To love, and do what you will;
To become responsible forever
For those whom you have tamed.

I offered, far too recklessly,
To walk with you this journey;
To love, shield, and embrace you
Under the shadow of my wings.

Together we went up
To the Little Jerusalem;
With me, you prayed the Amidah,
Then sent me off to Golgotha.

We appeared before great rabbis–
The living and the dead;
Stood before Jews and Gentiles,
And then my blood you shed.

We shared our last Passover,
Singing songs of hallel;
Then, with a kiss, you betrayed me
To Rome, and to the gates of hell.

Job’s sufferings and agony
Assiduously you studied;
Then laid his griefs upon me,
Leaving me stunned and bloodied.

As I bitterly wept and sighed,
You turned away in silence;
Abandoned me, crucified,
To tour the Land of Promise.

While I still hung in desperation,
You made one last request:
That your good name and reputation
I would please not harm or contest.

The heart you had just won and tamed
You broke, bruised, cut, and maimed;
My soul you softly pierced and killed
So you could better do God’s will.

To stand guard over your solitude
I was wholeheartedly devoted;
Yet you showed no solicitude
When I needed you the most.

You coldly spurned every appeal,
Gave icy silence to each petition;
Ignored all prayers and desperate pleas,
Refused to mend, heal, or even listen.

Why did you turn from light to darkness–
Sweet memories to bitter sadness?
Did you not preach responsibility
Before smiting love so cruelly?

You spoke of truth, then flatly lied,
Gave lip service to goodness;
Your own beauty you badly marred
By turning coldly ruthless.

You ever seek great saints and martyrs,
Praising their courage and dignity;
Yet you misled, used, and discarded,
Then fled with cowardice and duplicity.

How does one live with so much dissonance?
Trampling on others with piety;
Humbly promoting one’s self-importance;
Saving the world by treachery.

How many holy thrills experienced
Hiding dark contradictions,
When love and trust you sacrificed
On the altar of vain ambition?

I miss the friend I thought you were;
Was certain you’d rise to the occasion;
That you would live up to your ideals–
Convinced you were a better person.

Driven by restless activism,
O unresponsive and tepid soul;
Passion misguided by narcissism,
The heart you wounded most is yours.

As you affirmed your dignity,
You would not look me in the eye;
Did you serve well the common good
As I gasped for breath and died?

While building up society,
Close friendship you sabotaged;
Involved your gifts and talents
To disappoint, hurt, and dehumanize.

What is this heart of ice and stone–
A reflection of who you are?
You left mine wholly crushed and torn–
Is that for which you stand?

By wounding and betraying,
You missed a higher calling:
To bring honour and glory
To God and to your country.

The Lonely Shepherd

There is a shepherd alone in his grief,
Deprived of all pleasure and joy,
His thoughts on his shepherdess intent,
And his heart is by love most cruelly torn.

He weeps, not because wounded with love,
Nor because of the pain of his grief,
Though his heart has been pierced so deep;
But because he thinks he is forgot.

His beautiful shepherdess, so does he think,
Has forgotten him: that thought alone
Overwhelms him with grief in a land not his own,
And his heart is by love most cruelly torn.

The shepherd exclaims, ah wretch that I am!
For I am abandoned and left;
My presence is shunned by my love,
And my heart for her love is most cruelly torn.

At last he was raised on a tree,
Where he opened his beautiful arms,
And hanging thereby breathed his last,
His heart by love most cruelly torn..

-- St John of the Cross

Rediscovering the Holy Temple of Jerusalem

During Lent, one great way to gain new insights into Christ’s life, passion, death and resurrection – and also into our own Christian liturgy – is to get to know the place that was at the center of Jesus’ own spiritual life: the Temple.  The Jerusalem Temple was the holy seat of the Divine Presence and the heart and soul of Judaism in Jesus’ days.  So it’s no surprise that the Gospels present Jesus’ life and ministry as revolving around the Temple:

Soon after He was born, Joseph and Mary presented Jesus in the Temple (Lk 2:27). 

He taught in the Temple at age twelve (Lk 46) and then throughout his life (Mt 21:23; Mk 12:35; 14:49; Lk 19:47; 21:38; Jn 7:14; 8:2; 18:20); He also healed in the Temple (Mt 21:14). 

He viewed the Temple as his “Father’s House” and drove out the money changers from it out of concern for its sanctity (Mt 21:12; Mk 11:15; Lk 19:45; Jn 2:14). 

Finally, Jesus said that He is Himself greater than the Temple (Mt 12:6) announcing that His own body would be a new Temple (Mt 26:61; Mk 14:58; Jn 2:19-21). 

There have been two Temples in the history of Israel: The first was built by King Solomon around 970 B.C. (cf. 1 Ki 6), and it was destroyed by the Babylonians in 586 B.C. (2 Ki 25).  The Second Temple was built by Zerubbabel after the return from Babylonian Exile in 516 B.C.; it was renovated and enlarged by King Herod the Great around 19 B.C., and was destroyed by the Romans in 70 A.D.

The Temple as it looked in Jesus' days

Both Temples were built on the Temple Mount, approximately where the Muslim Dome of the Rock stands today.  This is why the Western Wall is the holiest site for the Jews today – because it is the closest spot to where the Holy of Holies used to stand.  There, the Divine Shekhinah rested over the Ark of the Covenant and between the Cherubim as the tangible sign of God’s Presence in the midst of His people.

The Temple Institute

One really interesting way of getting acquainted with the Temple of Jesus’ days is by visiting the Temple Institute in the Jewish Quarter of the Old City of Jerusalem.  Situated on Misgav LaDach Street, one arrives there by walking down from the main square of the Jewish Quarter towards the Western Wall.  Misgav LaDach is the last street on the left just before going down the stairs leading to the Wall.

The Temple Institute is quite small, consisting of three rooms, a bookshop and small movie screening room.  The bookshop offers a number of superb books on the Temple, as well as Bible Atlases, Temple models, and more.

The guide explaining the role of the priests and of the altar of incense

In the first room, the main showcase features two figures, one of the High Priest and one of a regular priest, standing next to a golden altar of incense just like the one that used to stand in the sanctuary.  Incense was offered daily on this altar, rising towards heaven and symbolizing the prayers of the people rising to God.  The High Priest is wearing his intricate “golden garments,” consisting of ephod, breastplate, robe, tunic, turban, belt, crown, and pants). 

As I walk around the room, a guide explains to a group of religious Israeli school children in Hebrew the role of the different instruments that were used in the Temple service, as well as the significance of the High Priest’s garments.  In other displays around the room, there are musical instruments that were played by the Levites in the Temple service, such as a lyre, harp and trumpets. 

At the center of the second room is a superb model of the Herodian Temple as it would have looked in Jesus’ days.  In the corner stands a small stone altar of sacrifice.  The walls of the room are decorated with several beautiful color paintings of the Temple in its former glory.

Model of the Second Temple

In the screening room, a short animated film explains various aspects of the Temple service and its sacrifices.

Walking down a few steps, we arrive at the third room.  On the right side, there is the large bronze laver which provided water to wash the priests’ hands and feet. 

In the main showcase, there is the table of showbread, with golden racks made to hold twelve large loaves of bread.  The twelve loaves (corresponding to the twelve tribes of Israel), that used to be constantly present on the table in the sanctuary and were replaced every Shabbat, represented the material abundance that God provides to the world.  On the left and right, there are vessels for the Temple service and bottles of wine for the drink offerings.

The guide in front of the table of showbread

Absent from the museum is the beautiful golden Menorah that lighted the interior of the sanctuary and symbolized God’s Wisdom and His spiritual blessing on Israel and the world.  (The Menorah is on open display outside, further down on the way to the Western Wall). 

Here also the walls are decorated with several beautiful scenes of both the first (Solomonic) and second (Herodian) Temples, including views of the inner sanctuary and of the High Priest offering incense in the Holy of Holies on Yom Kippur.

The Temple as Pillar of Creation

The guide asks the group of children: How far back does the Temple go?  Only as far back as Solomon? What are its origins? 

Abraham has a vision of the Temple

As a hint, he points to a picture in the back.  There, we see an image of the Aqedah – of Abraham about to sacrifice His son Isaac.  As he raises his knife to kill his son, Abraham has a mystical vision of the future Temple.  Indeed, the Bible tells us that Abraham’s offering of Isaac took place on Mount Moriah (Gen 22:2), the very place where the Temple would later be built.  This means that Abraham’s willingness to sacrifice his son to God was a foreshadowing of all the future sacrifices that would be later offered in the Temple.

But the Temple even goes further back in time.  In fact, Jewish tradition situates the Temple at the beginning of the creation of the world.  As some midrashic sources tell us, the Temple had been part of God’s design since even before creation, and it was built on the foundation stone of the world, called in Hebrew the Even Shetiyah.  This idea shows how it has always been God’s desire to dwell among His people, even from the beginning of time.

For religious Jews, the furnishings, instruments and garments prepared by the Temple institute are not just artifacts of historical interest.  They have been made according to the strictest requirements set out in the Torah for the purpose of being used in the future Third Temple.  Indeed, religious Jews pray every day for its speedy reconstruction.

Christian Fulfillment

Christians see the Temple differently: for us, a visit to the Temple Institute is first of all a fascinating journey through time.  It’s a unique opportunity to discover the magnificent house of worship that used to be at the heart of Jewish life for nearly 1,000 years.  But we also see the Temple fulfilled in Christ, in the Church’s liturgy, and in our own lives when through faith and baptism we become “temples of the Holy Spirit” (1 Cor 6:19).

As the Epistle to the Hebrew tells us, Christ is both the sacrificial victim who atoned for our sins and our High Priest who is “seated at the right hand of the throne of the Majesty in heaven” (Heb 8:1).  Now, at Mass, the priest acts in persona Christi (in the person of Christ) and offers incense on our behalf, representing our prayers rising to heaven.

The laver prefigures the priest’s washing of hands at Mass before the Eucharistic prayer; it’s a sign of his need for spiritual purification as he silently says “Lord, wash away my iniquity; cleanse me from my sin”.

The Menorah reminds us of Jesus who is the “light of the world” (Jn 8:12), represented by the lighted candles on the altar at Mass.

The loaves of showbread also prefigure Jesus who is the “bread of life” (Jn 6:35), and the drink offerings of wine foreshadow his turning water in wine at Cana (Jn 2:9).  And Christ now continues to remain present with us in a special way through His Body and Blood, given to us under the form of the Eucharistic bread and wine.

Christians who believe that Jesus’ resurrected body is the New Temple, and that this New Temple of the Holy Spirit is perpetuated in the Church and in the Body of every baptized believer, cannot share the same desire of our Jewish friends to see the physical Temple building reconstructed.  But we can pray with them for God to “return His Shekhinah to Zion” so that His presence and the power of his love and salvation may again come to dwell in its fullness, both in Jerusalem and in the entire world.

Discovering the Jerusalem from the Time of Jesus

What did Jerusalem look like in Jesus’ days?  For most of Christian history, this question remained shrouded in mystery.

When the Temple and city were destroyed by the Romans in 70 A.D., the ruins remained buried for nearly two millennia - even after the Jewish People began to return to the Land of Israel at the end of the nineteenth century.  During the war of Independence (1948), the Jewish Quarter of the Old City was largely destroyed by the Jordanians and it remained off limits to Jews for 19 years, until Israel retook the Old City during the Six Day War (1967).

After the Six Day War, during the renovation of the Jewish Quarter (1967-82), the ancient site was uncovered, revealing spectacular finds: a luxurious Second Temple period residential quarter in the Upper City of Jerusalem.  Because of its grandeur and opulence, it was renamed the Herodian Quarter, also known today as the Wohl Museum of Archeology.

In the days when Jesus came up to Jerusalem every year to celebrate the Jewish festivals, the wealthy aristocratic and priestly families lived in the magnificent houses of the Herodian Quarter.  It is easy to see why this area, built on a hillside overlooking the nearby Temple Mount, would have been particularly attractive to priests who ministered in the Temple every day.

Today, this is the largest and most important site from Second Temple times that can still be seen in Jerusalem’s Jewish Quarter.  Perhaps even some of the priests and Sadducees whom the Gospels recall as disputing with Jesus, lived in these houses.

Descending three meters below the present ground level, we go back 2,000 years in time, to the upper city of Jerusalem in the Herodian period.

One of the houses in the Herodian Quarter

The archeological remains of the cellars of six luxurious homes - probably then two stories in height - provide a vivid picture of the inhabitants’ wealth.  Numerous storage rooms, reservoirs, bathhouses and ritual baths, ovens, colorful mosaics, frescoes, elegant household items and other decorative adornments led archaeologists to conclude that the residents enjoyed a very high standard of living.

One unique find is the seven-branched menorah (candelabra) carved on one of the walls. This is the oldest explicit depiction of the menorah, and it was probably carved by a person who had actually seen the original menorah, still at use at that time in the Temple.

Throughout the museum there are displays of terra cotta tableware, imported amphorae for wine and delicate flasks.  The presence of several ritual baths and many stone vessels are an indication that the residents were priests who strictly adhered to the Jewish laws of ritual purity, because stone vessels were not subjected to ritual impurity.

Comparative pictures in the museum show how the site developed over the years, with illustrations of the Jewish Quarter in the 1940s (before it was destroyed in the War of Independence), during the excavations in the 1970s, and the rebuilt Jewish Quarter in the 1990s.

On the eastern side of the site, we arrive at a row of columns that belonged to a “peristyle” – a colonnade surrounding an open court – which formed part of an especially fine mansion.  The Peristyle Building testifies to the wealth of the neighborhood and to how the inhabitants designed their homes meticulously in the Greco-Roman style that was popular in those times. From here the residents would have had a splendid view of the Temple esplanade where Jesus spent much of his time when he was in Jerusalem.

The Columns of the Peristyle Building

A little further down, there is a beautiful mosaic floor found in the reception hall of another elegant Jewish residence.  Then, we come to the “palatial mansion”, the largest and most splendid of the houses uncovered on the site, probably inhabited by one of the families of the High Priest.

As one nears the end of the tour, a burnt room provides a glimpse of the tragic and violent end of the neighborhood and its inhabitants: The charred wooden beams that collapsed from the ceiling and the burnt mosaic stones testify to the great fire that raged in the city and to the destruction wrought by the Romans –the last moments of Jerusalem in its glory.

The Herodian Quarter as it would have looked in the days of Jesus

The Wohl Museum is situated just off the main square in the Jewish Quarter of the Old City of Jerusalem.  Guided tours and private tours are available, as well as MP3 recorded tours.  For reservations, call 02-626-5922 or visit http://www.jewish-quarter.org.il/ 

Celebrating the Baptism of Jesus with the Franciscans of the Holy Land

On January 8, Travelujah arranged for me to to accompany the Franciscans of the Holy Land on their annual pilgrimage to the Jordan River. This “annual” trip was rather unique, because the same event was celebrated at the same place… less than three months ago.  The reason: Until recently, the Baptismal Site known as “Qasr al Yahud” was a closed military zone, and pilgrims were allowed to go there only once a year, on the last Thursday of October.  But last summer the Israeli authorities opened the site all year-round.  With the site now much more accessible, the Franciscans decided to move the date of their annual pilgrimage to the most appropriate liturgical time for it, on the Feast of the Baptism of the Lord, celebrated on the first Sunday after Epiphany (January 6).

On the way to the Jordan River

The busload of friars left Notre Dame Center in Jerusalem shortly after 8 AM, with a festive atmosphere on board.  The attempts of Fr. Artemio Vitores, the Custodial Vicar, to announce the order of the day on the microphone were periodically interrupted by various jokes and songs.  After only a half-hour ride, we made a brief first stop at the Parish of the Good Shepherd in Jericho, where the friars and faithful were welcomed by the local civil authorities.  Fifteen minutes later, we were back on the bus and heading for the Jordan River.

At the Jordan River

As soon as we arrived, the Franciscans lined up for their ceremonial procession, starting from an abandoned monastery next to the parking lot.  The friars led the procession towards the river, walking through the rocky ground in two orderly rows while singing Latin hymns such as “Lauda Ierusalem Dominum” and “Christus vincit”.  They were followed by the Custos of the Holy Land, Fr. Pierbattista Pizzaballa, accompanied by religious, civil and military dignitaries, and with the faithful closing ranks just behind them.

The Franciscan Procession to the Jordan River

Once arrived at the shore of the Jordan, the Mass began promptly, celebrated by the Custos. The setting was ideal as we sat in balmy weather under the palm trees, just a few feet away from the water in which Jesus was baptized by John the Baptist.  The reading from the Gospel of Matthew reminded us that this is the place where Jesus’ calling and mission were revealed by the Father, when after coming out of the water the heavens were opened, the Spirit of God descended like a dove upon Him, and a voice from heaven said "This is My beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased" (Mat 3:17).

Holy Mass Celebrated at the Jordan River

When the Custos walked around the crowd, sprinkling the people as a reminder of our baptismal promises, it felt like a unique privilege to be blessed with a few drops of water from the Jordan on this Feast of the Baptism of Jesus.  As Fr. Ibrahim, the parish priest of Jericho, reminded us in the homily, our baptism signifies a dying with Christ and rising to new life with Him.  The moment was surely especially moving for the parents of the five children who were then baptized by Fr. Ibrahim.

In contrast to the deserted Jordanian shore of the river facing us, just a stone’s throw away, the large joyful crowd on our side left no doubt that a festive event was being celebrated.

“It’s great to be here, a real privilege” said Brother Maurizius, a Benedictine seminarian who joined the Franciscans for the day.  “It was a very nice celebration at the Jordan River, on the day of Jesus’ baptism at the place of his baptism.”

Fr. Paul, a young Indian priest studying in Jerusalem, echoed him: “I really enjoyed this day, it was really wonderful to see five children being baptized at the same place where Jesus was baptized.”

The Mount of Temptation

On the way up to the Mount of Temptation

After Mass, we got back on the bus and headed for the Mount of Temptation, traditionally believed to be the place where Jesus went into the desert after His baptism to be tempted by Satan for 40 days.  The hike up to the Greek Monastery, protruding from the rock high above Jericho, was not as daunting as it looked from below – a mere 20 minute walk from the parking lot.  At the entrance of the monastery, a Franciscan deacon read the account of Jesus’ temptation before we entered for a short visit. We walked through the narrow passageway that connects the entire monastery, and were treated to some refreshments and snacks, courtesy of the Orthodox Monks who take care of the monastery.  We then had a quick peek at the few modest chapels and caves carved into the rock in this masterpiece of monastic architecture, before heading back down to the bus towards our last top of the day.

Lunch at the Jericho Parish

Lunch in Jericho

We ended where we began, on the lawn of the parish church of Jericho.  Friars and guests were treated by the local Palestinian Christian community to a fantastic lunch of grilled meats, Arabic salads (including the obligatory hummus and eggplant spread), and various baked goods.  It was a light time of casual conversation, old and new encounters with much good humor and laughter, and the sharing of experiences in many languages:  in addition to the lingue franche of the day, Italian and Arabic, one also heard plenty of Spanish, French, English, Hebrew, and other tongues.

In a time of conflict and turmoil in the Middle East, it was a mini-reversal of the Tower of Babel and actualization of the unity and fraternity of Pentecost.  This was most visible at the end of the day, when some of the Franciscans got together to sing songs in their various languages. The improvised talent show crowned a day well spent celebrating the beginning of Jesus’ ministry and our own participation in the mystery of His life, death and resurrection.

Franciscan Talent Show in Jericho

View the complete photo album of the Franciscan Pilgrimage to the Jordan River

Quiz: Are you living out the Church's mission of evangelization?

I am not the most punctual person in the world. Since the AHC conference last October I have wanted to write about the topic of evangelization and proselytism. This project, however, was trumped in our last newsletter by our commentary on Israel as "womb" of the Second Coming, as a response to the controversy with a Palestinian priest on the topic of "Catholics for Palestine" and "Catholics for Israel."

Today, the moment has come. I feel that the topic of evangelization and proselytism is timely for at least two reasons.

The first reason is the urgency of the task of the new evangelization, urgent because formerly Christian countries are seriously threatened on two fronts - by an increasingly aggressive anti-Christian secularism on the one hand, and the equally aggressive growth of Islam on the other.

The second reason is the considerable confusion that seems to reign among many Christians and especially Catholics regarding evangelization and proselytism. Confusion on this topic now would be nothing less than disastrous if  it results in neutralizing believers from carrying out precisely the Church's most critical task of our time. It would not be an exaggeration to even characterize as "work of the devil" any thought construct that would lead to the paralysis of the Church's central mission.

And so today we ask the questions: What is evangelization? What is proselytism? What is the difference between them? How should we relate to non-believers? Should we try to convert them? Or just accept and love them the way they are?

Some would have us believe that proselytism is a great problem nowadays, displaying great disrespect for people of various faiths, religions and walks of life. But is this really the case - in light the Church's definition of  proselytism - or is the real problem actually quite the opposite?

Before we go any further I would like to invite you to do a little self-evaluation quiz. This test will help you to determine where you stand - whether you are being faithful to the Church's call to the new evangelization, and if not, what may be some of the false presuppositions or ideas lurking "below the surface" that are hindering you from responding to the call. The quiz will also hopefully help to make the rest of this article more interesting and relevant to you.

So without further ado, why don't you go ahead and take the quiz now...

[Quiz no longer available]

Well, how did you do?

Allow me to take a guess: My guess is that not too many Catholics are guilty of proselytism. I suspect that more of us are influenced and affected by the secular humanist or post-modernist/relativistic worldview.

Now let's look at a few definitions to help us better understand the results of the quiz. The Church has spoken profusely about evangelization and mission in the last forty years, and so we don't suffer from a lack resources on the topic. For the sake of simplicity, however, I will quote here from only one document - the most recent one published by the Congregation for the Doctrine of Faith, called rather unimaginatively Doctrinal Note on Some Aspects of Evangelization (hereafter DNE). It is neither the best nor the most inspiring text, but it is relatively short, simple, straightforward and perfectly adequate for our purposes (I will list some of the other documents at the end of the newsletter).

Evangelization 

What, then, is evangelization?

Evangelization "sums up the Church's entire mission." It consists in "the proclamation and handing on of the Gospel, which is 'the power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes' (Rom 1:16)."  It is to "proclaim Jesus Christ by one's words and actions."  Note that the document specifies that actions only are not enough; they must be accompanied by words to effectively transmit the Gospel of salvation to others. Every person has the right to hear the good news, and this implies that every Christian has a corresponding duty to evangelize. The gravity of this task is poignantly expressed in St. Paul's words: "Woe to me if I do not preach the Gospel!" (1 Cor 9:16). And the primary objective of evangelization? It is to "help all persons to meet Christ in faith" (DNE 2).

Where is Christ most especially encountered? Through incorporation into the community of believers, that is, in the Church. And so "since the beginning, the Gospel, in the power of the Spirit, is proclaimed to all people so that they might believe and become disciples of Christ and members of his Church."  The desire that people be saved through communion with Jesus in the Church is not something to be ashamed of. On the contrary, "the Christian spirit has always been animated by a passion to lead all humanity to Christ in the Church" (DNE 9).

Proselytism  

But isn't this desire to make people Catholics precisely what constitutes proselytism? No, it is not, and this is precisely wherein lies the modern-day confusion.

Proselytism, actually, is using "deception, selfish motives or arrogance" in trying to convert people, thus "failing in respect for the dignity and religious freedom of the partners in dialogue. For this reason, the Church severely prohibits forcing people to embrace the faith or leading or enticing them by improper techniques" (DNE 8). In other words, proselytism is the "promotion of a religion by using means, and for motives, contrary to the spirit of the Gospel; that is, which do not safeguard the freedom and dignity of the human person" (DNE 12; n. 49).

How then are we to avoid proselytism? In the task of Evangelization, everyone should "'refrain at all times from any kind of action which might seem to suggest coercion or dishonest or improper persuasion, especially when dealing with poor or uneducated people" (DH 4). In short, "the witness to the truth does not seek to impose anything by force, neither by coercive action nor by tactics incompatible with the Gospel" (DNE 12).
Simple enough? Don't force people into the faith at gunpoint (or the equivalent - through fear, guilt trips, etc...). Inviting people into the faith, however, is quite another matter.

"I don't proselytize": Respect for others or cop-out from one's duty to evangelize? 

I have mentioned above that many people nowadays see proselytism as a big problem - a terribly disrespectful and intolerant thing to do. Put on the defensive by such criticism, one often hears Catholics - even some involved in missionary work - assuring us that they "don't do" that awful thing, proselytism. But what do they mean by that? The next time you hear someone make such a statement, ask them to clarify. Do they mean:

"I don't use any dishonest, deceptive or coercive measures to try to convert people" (the right answer!)

Or do they mean, rather:

"I have no interest at all (or lack the courage) to help people come to salvation by inviting them, in respect and love, to repent of their sins, accept Christ's forgiveness and receive the gift of the Holy Spirit through faith and communion with the Church."  (If this is what they mean, they will probably tend to muddle the answer a bit).

Sadly, I fear that too many Christians who claim to not proselytize really mean that they don't evangelize. Perhaps they are simply intimidated be the daunting task, and this is understandable. But perhaps they have fallen prey to what Pope Benedict has calledthe "dictatorship of relativism," that symptom of the post-modern world which refuses to accept any truth as definitive apart from one's own subjective whims.

Relativism: The Great Enemy of Evangelization

Under the leadership of Benedict, the Church has tackled the bull of relativism by the horns. In our document, she expresses her concern for the "growing confusion" today which

"leads many to leave the missionary command of the Lord unheard and ineffective. Often it is maintained that any attempt to convince others on religious matters is a limitation of their freedom. From this perspective, it would only be legitimate to... invite people to act according to their consciences, without aiming at their conversion to Christ and to the Catholic faith. It is enough, so they say, to help people to become more human or more faithful to their own religion; it is enough to build communities which strive for justice, freedom, peace and solidarity. Furthermore, some maintain that Christ should not be proclaimed to those who do not know him, nor should joining the Church be promoted, since it would also be possible to be saved without explicit knowledge of Christ and without formal incorporation in the Church" (DNE 3).

Quite opposite to this relativistic mentality, the Church invites us not to lose confidence in the truth and goodness that Jesus the Messiah has come to reveal to humanity. For this reason,"love impels the followers of Christ to proclaim to all the truth which saves" (DNE 10) - the truth which is Jesus Christ Himself. As then cardinal Ratzinger said a few years ago, "mission and dialogue should no longer be opposites but should mutually interpenetrate. Dialogue is not aimless conversation: it aims at conviction, at finding the truth; otherwise it is worthless" (Many Religions, One Covenant, p. 112). Interreligious dialogue is thus not an end in itself but rather a "moment" in the Church's mission of evangelization (AG 11-12).

Let us, then, not lose heart, and may we work with renewed ardor to testify to the risen Lord with all our being, in our witness of holiness and in our words. Let's not forget that "even witness by itself is not enough because even the finest witness will prove ineffective in the long run, if it is not explained, justified – what Peter called ‘giving a reason for the hope that is in you’ (1 Pet 3:15) – and made explicit by a clear and unequivocal proclamation of the Lord Jesus'" (DNE 11). 

Important Church Documents on Mission and Evangelization

Second Vatican Council - Decree on the Mission Activity of the Church Ad Gentes (1965)
Pope Paul VI - Apostolic Exhortation Evangelii Nuntiandi (1975)
Pope John Paul II - Encyclical Letter Redemptoris Missio on the permanent validity of the Church's missionary mandate (1990)
Congregation for the Doctrine of Faith - Declaration Dominus Iesus on the Unicity and Salvific Universality of Jesus Christ and the Church (2000)
Congregation for the Doctrine of Faith - Doctrinal Note on Some Aspects of Evangelization (2007)

See also Catholics for Israel's PowerPoint presentation:
Go into all the World! The Church's Missionary Mandate

The Father and the Two Sons: A New Parable on Replacement Theology

A good father once had a firstborn son whom he deeply loved. As a token of his love for his son, the father gave him an old and beautiful family photo album.  This photo album was very special. It not only contained pictures, but also all the great stories of the family's past, as well as records of all their ancient customs and traditions - traditions which were still loved and cherished by the family to this very day, because they represented their very fabric and identity.  The firstborn son really loved this book.  He loved to read it hours on end, over and over, because it reminded him of the venerable traditions of his forefathers, of the great love of his own father for him, and of who he was today.  The old book shaped his identity and even inspired him and guided him in his day-to-day life.

Now because the father was very good and generous, he and his wife decided to adopt another boy - an abandoned orphan.  They lovingly took the boy into their family and he truly became another son to them.  At the same time, since they now lived in the modern age, the father bought a state of the art computer for his family. This computer not only had an archive of the family pictures and traditions, but of course it could do much more: it had games, Internet, graphics and music programs, encyclopedias, videos, etc.

The newly adopted son really loved this computer - and rightly so, because it truly was a beautiful gift that the father lovingly gave to his family. But for some reason, the firstborn son was not as enthusiastic about the computer as his adopted brother. The firstborn son was somewhat curious about the computer, but he still preferred to leaf through the yellowed pages of his old family album, remembering all the great stories of old and how these had shaped his family, who he is, and how they still lived today. 

The firstborn son's love for the old book began to annoy the newly adopted son, who was much more interested in the computer than in the book.  Instead of inquiring as to why the firstborn son loved the book so much, instead of showing interest for the heritage and customs of the family who had so kindly adopted him, and instead of expressing gratitude towards their heritage, he started to denigrate it.

After all, the computer was so much better than the old book!  Why hang on to the old antiquated thing? it should just be discarded. It served a purpose for a time but now we are in the computer age. Why stubbornly hang on to all the outdated traditions described in the book? The family should just let go of them and instead spend more time surfing the net.  Sure, the old book served a purpose before there were computers. It was a kind of preparation for the computer age.  As for now, we may want to keep the book somewhere on the shelves, as a collection piece, just to help us understand and appreciate the computer better, but it no longer carries real value of its own. Surely the firstborn son was retrograde and obstinate for hanging on to the old thing and not showing more interest for the computer.

Sadly, as a result of the adopted son's arrogant attitude, the firstborn son began to hate the computer and his adopted brother. He no longer wanted to have anything to do with the computer, and he hung on even more forcefully to his old book, the cherished sign of his father's love for him.  The result was a painful division in the family. Instead of both brothers joyfully sharing the computer (and the adopted brother appreciating and respecting the firstborn son's special love for the old book) as it should have been as a result of the father's goodness and generosity, there was now jealousy and animosity between the brothers - the adopted son boasting about the superiority of the computer and scorning the obsolescence of the old book, and the firstborn tenaciously holding on to his cherished album and no longer interested at all in the computer.

The reader will forgive me if the parallels are somewhat limping (suggestions for improvement are welcome) - but I think you will perceive the analogy:

The father is God. The firstborn son is Israel. The old album is the Torah, deeply loved by Israel as the sign of the covenant between God and His people. The computer is the Gospel.  The newly adopted son is the Church (or rather Gentile Christians). Obviously, there was no need to set the computer against the book - the Gospel against the Torah.  Both were beautiful gifts, lovingly bestowed by the father onto his sons.  True, in many ways the computer is vastly superior to the old book. But as the firstborn son had a particular historical and cultural attachment to the old book, so Israel has a great love for the Torah, because it is not only the sign of God's covenant love for them but also their history book and the record of their customs which have shaped their very identity to this day. If the adopted son had truly desired to share the computer with his brother, the firstborn son, he could have simply told him about it and all the great things that it did, with enthusiasm and excitement.  But he also could have shown some interest, respect, and appreciation for the old family album and everything it represented.  This surely would have strengthened the friendship between the two boys and caused the firstborn son to be more interested in the computer.

Likewise, many supersessionist Gentile Christians rail against Israel for having rejected the Gospel. Instead of proclaiming the good news of Christ with joy and love, with gratitude and appreciation to the Jewish people because they as Gentiles have now been "adopted into the household of Israel" (Eph 2), demonstrating a humble eagerness to learn about the rich Jewish traditions (many of whom not only were divinely revealed but also shaped who Jesus was and is), they spend more time denigrating the Torah and the Mosaic Covenant - appreciating it, perhaps, for its historical value as a preparation for the Gospel and retaining the moral foundation of the Decalogue, but dismissing the rest as outdated and superseded - certainly of no practical use today for the people to whom it was given.  These advocates of replacement theology are blind as to why Israel would still love and cherish the Torah, not realizing that it is their own arrogant attitude that constitutes the chief obstacle to the Jewish people accepting the Gospel.

Before we may hope to see Israel's eyes opened to the light of the Gospel, may we pray that the veil of arrogance over too many Christian eyes be lifted, that we may come to a more humble appreciation of the root into which we have been grafted:

And if some of the branches [unbelieving Jews] were broken off, and you [gentile Christian], being a wild olive tree, were grafted in among them, and with them became a partaker of the root and fatness of the olive tree, do not boast against the branches. But if you do boast, remember that you do not support the root, but the root supports you. You will say then, "Branches were broken off that I might be grafted in."  Well said. Because of unbelief they were broken off, and you stand by faith. Do not be haughty, but fear.   For if God did not spare the natural branches, He may not spare you either.  Therefore consider the goodness and severity of God: on those who fell, severity; but toward you, goodness, if you continue in His goodness. Otherwise you also will be cut off.  And they also, if they do not continue in unbelief, will be grafted in, for God is able to graft them in again.  For if you were cut out of the olive tree which is wild by nature, and were grafted contrary to nature into a cultivated olive tree, how much more will these, who are natural branches, be grafted into their own olive tree?  (Rom 11:17-24)